Yucky Hair

I’ll be honest, I’ve never once before wanted to kick a preschooler in the shins. Until last night.

Throw tomatoes at me if you will, raise your eyebrows at me – go ahead. I’d say it again even just for the shock factor, but unfortunately I’m serious. Saturday while Xavier was taking a nap and I had some well intended plans for cleaning, Prayse walked out and asked if we could do each others hair. How do you turn that down? It’s one of the fun things about having a daughter!

And she had a very specific idea of how she wanted her hair done. Now, I don’t know about your house, but in our house – we’re kind of free flowing with hair and clothes. I am not the Mom who frets over if P’s hair isn’t perfect or her shoes don’t match. You want to wear neon orange and black Halloween skirt with the Christmas Dora pajama shirt on the 4th of July? Cool. You feel like you can rock the black and white leopard skirt under the barely too short purple dress with one pink sandal and one white church shoe? Do your thing girlfriend (this actually WAS the outfit she chose for church this Sunday). I just figure we have more important things to fight over than clothes and as long as she’s not baring her belly, we’re good to go. Pick your battles – and trust me, I have plenty to pick from.

So naturally when she asked me to do her hair a certain way of course I’ll do it that way. And besides, I think she looks cute (inserted here of course the standard picture of my adorable kids b/c I’m the Mama who will brag about them any day, anywhere, any place).

Last night Prayse and I were sitting on the couch, and like all four year olds with the attention span of a gnat, the stories of her day come in snippets all throughout the evening. I had asked her if she wanted to keep her hair in for one more day or if we should wash it out. Of course the answer was that we should keep it in for five more days! Yeah, no. But right after that came the sentence that made me go all Mama Bear on some preschoolers,

“Janie said my hair is yucky.” (Names changed to protect the not-so-innocent).

My heart broke. I was quiet for a moment and told her, “Do you like your hair?” Yes, she did. “Well, babe. That’s all that matters. If you like your hair then whatever anybody else says doesn’t matter at all. Right?”

“Right!”

“Janie can worry about her own hair, b/c only what you think matters and if you like your hair then you wear it that way.”

“I like my hair. I told teacher on her.”

And in her mind, it was done – and she’ll be wearing the same style to school today. In talking with Raymonn about it he was shocked as well, but glad I chose the route I did. Very matter of fact – what YOU think matters babe – kind of way. His Mama had taken the same approach – one of instilling confidence and not of making them think their feelings should be hurt.

My feelings were hurt though. I want to protect her. In my mind this morning the prayer for wisdom as I raise her through womanhood was even more prominent. It’s a long journey, a twisty journey. I am not ready for this, but apparently I must be b/c it has begun.

Seeing as how kicking a preschooler in the shins is NOT the appropriate course of action, prayers for wisdom and advice as needed is what I’ll be asking you for.

Here we go…