Holy Homeowner Issues Batman!

We bought our house in April, it’s been a whirlwind experience to say the least. We knew it needed some work, “some TLC” is how the homeowner inspection guy put it. Well, we were just the family to provide that TLC!! We bought the house for the neighborhood and the potential we saw (you can follow that particular story here: www.midcenturymodernlife.com). But we figured, we’re down for this. We knew of the renovations we wanted to have done, we’ve been homeowners for 6 years now, we’ve got this.

I think there must be some magical thing that happens when you remove the “town” from town home and it’s just a home. Or maybe it’s just ours. Long story short we’ve had to completely replace the roof, just this past week had to create or dig a swale (not realizing just how much the previous owners lied about the water in the basement, we knew they were lying the minute we saw how the backyard sloped toward the house- but wow! Mini waterfalls every rainstorm), we’ve had to rework shoddy electrical stuff, random supporting walls disguised by wet bars that we tore down…

All of it par for the course we figured. Last night however , not par for the course. Good news though – I had a super hero in my house, course he was chasing after a villain… Yep, I had my own Batman, but I was no Robin. R and I were up late working on some things and so I was tired when Xavier woke up hungry at 5:15. I stumbled into his room to get him and decided to nurse him on the couch instead of the rocking chair. I heard something and just then R turned on the hallway light – BRIGHT!! He asked if I heard something, yes I had. Then I hear words that still make me cringe,

“Tiff!! We have a BAT in our house!”

Still processing, I walk into the hallway with a “huh?” look on my face – and apparently the darn thing flew right over my head.

“Get in Prayse’s room now! Shut the door!”

As I walk into her room and sit on the bed the hilarity of this all starts to hit me. Maybe it’s just the three hours of sleep, maybe it’s the hard walking I’m listening too throughout the house, maybe it was the pounding on the walls and me wondering what state the house would be in when I woke up (again)… but I just started to chuckle. This? Of all things. This? I would never have even guessed.

Oh, it gets better.

Raymonn walks into Prayse’s room and takes off his tennis shoes (I learned long ago, when a situation gets tense and you see my husband walk to get his tennis shoes, there’s about to be a fight – he was obviously ready for battle). He looks at me and says, “I’m sleeping in here with y’all tonight.”

Prayse. Xavier. Myself. Raymonn. A twin sized bed.

Are you getting this?

So Raymonn crawls in and the normal Miss Snugglebug curls up in the middle of her bed and says, “Please go away! I want to snuggle by myself!” Of course that would be her response. Of course. So R says, “Baby, this is not the time to be kicking Daddy out of your bed. Not tonight.”

Prayse then realizes she has to use the restroom – rest assured I took a good long look at the shower curtain rod before we went in (what? they could hang upside down from that thing!) – as Raymonn told me to close P’s bedroom door. During the seven step walk back to bed she also found her Barbie and a few other things who thought they could join the party.

So – Raymonn and Xavier at the head of the bed. Prayse, Mama, Barbie, and two stuffed puppy dogs at the foot of the bed. The twin sized bed. There was no sleeping going on for this Mama. As exhausted as I was I couldn’t stop the giggles, nor could I breathe with Barbie all up in my throat.

This morning as R walked into the bathroom, I couldn’t help it. I lost control and the laughter ensued. What else are we going to do?

He looked at me and said, “I was thinking the whole time I was running around the house with the laundry basket (his weapon of choice). Is this a time when you stand up and fight for your family? Or retreat? Sorry babe, I couldn’t find him, I had to retreat.”

Laughing and with a hug, I fell deeper in love with my superhero. I realized, these are the stories that make up our family. This is the stuff we’ll still be laughing about years down the road. Rest assured, this will be funnier later though.

Now, anyone know how to find and get a bat out of your house? B/c I’m the one walking the halls at night running between our bedroom and Xavier’s. I’m an easy target. Not okay!!