Love “… but by our actions and true caring.”

Love. I’ve been reading a lot about it lately. I read a book called Crazy Love by Francis Chan. A book about falling so deeply in love with God, why it’s important, what it looks like – it’s a case for falling in love. I opened up my Bible this morning after being woken up by a sleepy three-year-old at 6:00 a.m. who was able to go back to sleep, while I couldn’t stop thinking. I opened it up to 1 John and read a few chapters. All about love. And, not really our love – but God’s love for us and maybe even more importantly how we take that love and spread it.

Two things really stood out to me. Glaringly, blatantly, can’t get my mind off of it, stood out to me. 1 John 3:18 – “My children, we should love people not only with words and talk, but by our actions and true caring.” It has been a running theme that I cannot get away from. Honestly. Our pastor started a new series on Relationships a few weeks ago – about love and how the reality of our vertical love of God (us and him, heaven to earth) is really measured by the horizontal love that we show others (he put it much better – but you get the picture).

I get it, I really do. I’ve always attempted to love on others. But when you stop to think about it, when you REALLY stop to think on what this is, what does it mean, how to do it tangibly – what do I do that’s different? What do I do that screams “HE REALLY DOES LOVE YOU!!!!”? Yeah, I’m nice. Yeah, I stop and tell people good morning. Do I ask about their weekend? Check. Do I ask about their family? Check. Do I make polite conversation in the hallway? Check.

Great. Fab. How is that different than the normal everyday you should be polite anyway mentality that we all should live by unless you are so totally miserable that there is no other place except to spill on others – way of life? And then – can I even really know what the difference is unless I truly study, care about, and spend some time with the one who even created LOVE to figure out how He does it? Huh.

We’ve always been asked in church to really think about the one person who is hard to love. Maybe they’re just crabby toward you, you cannot carry on a legitimate conversation without one of you getting frustrated, maybe is such anger there that nothing gets accomplished – write down their name and truly focus on loving that individual. I’d always walk away with that blank. After all, I really truly enjoy everyone I work with. Everyone I interact with at work on a daily basis I honestly enjoy being around, talking to, and helping. Whether it’s a client or colleague – I enjoy being around them. I can also say that every single individual that I really know within my family I enjoy being around. I don’t understand them all, I get frustrated at times – but it is not hard for me to be around my immediate or extended family. I look forward to it even.

Then came the call and it hit me. I remembered every other time and realized there was a pattern that had happening for over a year. Tears of frustration and humiliation turned into a quiet moment and I heard the words, “Love him.” How? I have no clue. I really don’t. There are boundaries – It is a man, I am a woman. He is a client, I am a vendor. And oh yeah – he does not like me or respect me. That cuts deep. I cherish the relationships and friendships I have with my clients. To have him not only not respect me but for the seemingly continual frustration he feels toward me impact other relationships I have forged – I’ll say it again, it cuts deep. But here’s the thing – I do not know how, I have no game plan. But in one year – we will sit across from each other with a mutual respect. Maybe not friendship, but at the bare minimum, respect. I will not shy away for fear of saying something random that will get him frustrated or upset. No. I will show him love. I don’t know how. But I am making it a priority to hit my knees in prayer and trust that it will be shown to me.

I can tell my attitude is already changing and something that is genuine and starts on the inside, it will eventually be shown on the outside as well.

#2 coming tomorrow…