Ghosts

I’ve been thinking a lot about Jon lately. I can’t get him off my mind. I see him everywhere. We had some clients in the office and had dinner together one evening. One gentleman had picked out dessert first – he ordered dinner but made sure to leave room for dessert and made it known he had it scoped out from the moment we sat down. I thought of Jon.

I see motorcycles everywhere around town,  on the highway, on the interstate. I think of Jon.

When I’m enjoying myself with friends and/or family, I think of Jon and his letter telling us that we are going to have to learn how to have fun without him, to start living and enjoying life. I think of work and some of the changes coming up and I remember him telling me on the 4th of July that we must remember to enjoy and to celebrate our successes, because without that it’s simply not worth doing.

Why is this hitting me so hard? Two and a half months later – and I am in tears. Why is that do you think?

I believe in a spiritual world, I am a scaredy cat and so I refuse to watch any movies with ghosts or demons. I think probably because I believe in spiritual warfare. I never had thought about those that had passed having an active role in our lives- and maybe they don’t. But maybe they do. Or maybe they have left such a legacy and it still feels like they are with us, encouraging us, laughing with us, smiling upon us. That’s the kind of legacy I’d want to leave. It certainly is Jon’s. Dang it. Stupid driver. You stupid, stupid driver.